Friday, July 25, 2008

Call for submissions: Testic Lit

Inspired by one of my faves who has been mentioning her personal “chic lit” progress all summer, I’ve decided to research and compile one for the boys.

Let’s call it...Testic Lit. ("dick lit" sounded far too plebeian)

This list—--for the men out there who find themselves yearning for a bit more than occasional GQ magazine or blockbuster action flick---will cover all things that happen to be fucking cool.

This list MAY include:

-Current events, pirates, money, murder, gadgets, music, sex, sin, and gratuitous violence.
-Distinguished authors. Let's go for quality plus excitement with this list.

This list may NOT include

-Comic books (let’s not dig ourselves any deeper);
-Stories containing the words nail polish, romance, shopping, self-help, Prada, pregnancy, or feminine napkin;
-Any book with the words “eat”, “love” and “pray” in the title;
-References to Mars/Venus, unless you happen to be battling aliens on said planets;
-Descriptive metaphors for sex acts (I’m talking to YOU hot and pulsing root of manhood);
-No lame mysteries that you buy from the checkout stand at Wal-Mart.

This may prove harder than we think. In a few quick Google searches, I uncovered only lists that helped men to find Christ, resolve identity problems, and books men should read if they ever felt like engaging in domestic violence.

So provide me with some recommendations in the comments section. Haven't read it yet? I don't care. I’ll compile them on Monday and we’ll have a handy guide to getting through the strapping, broad shouldered tome at a time.


Stef said...


I <3 testiclit

kevingnyberg said...

I take issue with your exclusion of comic books. "Y the Last Man" by Brian K. Vaughan and Pia Guerra is the best thing I've read in recent memory. It follows the life of Yorick Brown and his pet monkey Ampersand, who are the only survivors of a plague that essentially eradicated the Y chromosome. The main characters: Yorick, his bodyguard 355, and their biologist companion Dr. Mann, drive the series forward as they try to unravel what caused the plague and why Yorick was the one man to survive, but Vaughan has created the perfect social experiment to examine the current role of men in society: by speculating on what life would be like without them.

Yes, there is girl-on-girl action, tastefully done. Usually. There are also more insightful observations. In a reversal, theater is now performed with women in drag as men. Australia is now the major military power on the seas because they were the only country to allow women to serve on submarines. The Secretary of Agriculture, somewhere in the teens in terms of line of succession, is the new President of the United States. Israel is still at war with all its neighbors.

I can't recommend "Y" highly enough, but if you're going to force me to adhere to your "no comic books" rule (and you're not), I would recommend one of two by Dave Eggers - his first, "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius," which is a memoir about his struggles to take care of himself and his little brother after his parents both die of cancer within months of each other. The second is his latest, "What is the What?" which is a story loosely based on one of the Lost Boys of Sudan. Predictably, Eggers details the tribal warfare of Sudan (pre-Darfur), the child soldiers, the interference of Western business interests at the heart of so many African conflicts, but he also challenges the U.S.'s self-image as a country welcoming to outsiders, particularly the relationship between Africans and African-Americans.

I could also give you a lot of worm lit, but I doubt that would it would merit much consideration.

Narm said...

Um I don't know if this is just for reading materials but I think all men should have to watch Deadliest Catch on Discovery. It is like crack.

I've been reading On The Road and Catch-22 lately and found them to be a little more accessible to guys than your typical book.

Stef said...

George Saunders.